17 Weeks

When they say that the second trimester is better, it's no joke. I feel like I'm in Happyland, comparatively speaking. But when they say that you'll feel a "burst of energy" and feel amazing again, what they mean is, you'll feel almost normal. Yes, I can finally stay awake past 9:30 PM, I can wait 30 minutes after I wake up to eat my first meal, I no longer feel like vomiting would make my day so much better, and the pimples on my face are starting to look dated.

But it's not as if I feel un-pregnant. There are still plenty of happy and strange reminders that I'm carrying our little darling. There are days though where I go through hours of the day not even thinking about the fact that I'm pregnant. Compared to several weeks ago, this is a whole new daily paradigm!

Second trimester pregnancy has it's own special moments though. I'm still kinda broken out. I now have a hard time putting on my socks. (Fortunately, Sydney showed me her technique. And, at that moment, when she was demonstrating sock assembly, I had to think to myself "This is really happening.") I have officially outgrown all of my normal jeans. I no longer feel silly tracking charming names that I come across. I have started a list of needed baby items. I enjoy cooking again. And I cleaned my house...a little.

It's so fascinating the way pregnancy alters what are seemingly normal experiences. When I work out, I sweat much more and I breathe heavier. I am just getting over a cold that lasted a full week and knocked me off my feet in ferocious fashion (my poor hubby had to see me weep in self-pity in the middle of the night a few nights). Every winter, I get a dry skin flare-up on my hands and this winter it's a full blown rash.

And my dreams. Whoa. My dreams. I read yesterday that pregnant women often feel that they have very active and strange dream lives because they have shorter REM sleep cycles. These shorter cycles are caused by constantly waking up in the middle of the night to pee, or because of heartburn pain, leg cramps, discomfort, etc. Since preggers ladies are waking up more, they are more likely to remember their dreams. Furthermore, dreams may be more strange or emotional because, well, it's a nuanced time--lots of intense emotions, highs and lows, you name it, we got it.

These nights, I definitely wake up so much more often now during the night. I head to the toilet about four times a night. I also wake up in discomfort a lot becuase I am trying to coax myself to sleep on my side. Pregnant women this far along are instructed to not sleep on their stomachs (duh) and on their backs. When a pregnant woman sleeps on her back, she can interrupt the baby's circulation (the weight of the uterus can press on the vena cava), and she can cause muscle pains, a drop in blood pressure, and hemorrhoids. I know, yikes. Well, I've always been a back sleeper so this is a major feat for me. I find myself on my back throughout the night and wake up in frenzy to shift. It's a big project. Even more, they recommend the left side to sleep on as it improve some organ functioning. Hm.

Anyway, my dreams have been out of this world. I dream that I have babies, you have babies, and we all birth baby animals. There's also a lot of rescuing babies, small children, and little animals. I also dream that I'm being a bad pregnant person. In one dream, I sat and chainsmoked and couldn't get myself to stop smoking. In another dream, I got buzzed on a couple beers and then freaked out when I realized I was pregnant.

But truly, the most wonderful thing of all to date of this trimester is feeling Little move. I felt it. And it was amazing. A couple weeks ago, I was lying my bed (apparently being horizontal helps) and I felt something "swim" through me, it felt a bit like a shooting star. I thought maybe...but didn't get too excited because it was so early (15 weeks at that point) and generally they say you don't feel anything until 16 weeks or a little later. Well, I felt Little this week and I'm completely confident it was the babe. I was (again) lying on my bed and the sensation of a bubble of water floated from bottom to the top of my lower abdomen. I shook with excitement for just a moment and and then held as still as possible. And then, again, Little said hello. The same sensation happened again seconds later. It was something I've never felt before and it was so peculiar. And, well, really wonderful. Hello back, Little. I love you.